“What appears to be a threat can be seen as an opportunity. Difficulties in communication between parents and children, when properly addressed, can lead to a deepening of their relationship and conscious building of family ties”, stressed Dr Renata Pomarańska, an academic and family expert at the Catholic University of Lublin, who conducted workshops for children and young people during the Congress of Families in Poland and the Polish Diaspora in Gdańsk, in an interview with Family News Service. The Congress was held September 15-17, 2023.

Rodzice z dziećmi

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Both Polish and expatriate families face the problem of difficult relationships with children and young people. “It is worth talking to and building relationships with children at every opportunity. It is worth taking the trouble to understand what the children’s needs and interests are and to communicate with them about it in a simple way” – emphasised Dr Renata Pomarańska, and observed that problems communicating with children stem from the core inability of parents to build relationships: “The family is attacked from within by individualism, or self-fulfilment to the detriment of others”.

Dr Renata Pomarańska stressed that contemporary ideologies are not conducive to the fostering of family ties and oftentimes promote inappropriate models of family life. The scholar summed up: “A strong family based on respect and trust is capable of living a dignified life and cope with the many and varied challenges and threats. This is contingent on the family being strong with the faith, love, and close emotional ties between parents and children as well as between the older generation of the grandparents”.

The university expert indicated that “Polish families are often divided and an absence of one or both parents results in upbringing deficiencies and faults in the transmission of the faith. According to the scholar, the child should know why the parent’s/parents’ emigration is necessary, how long it will take and what its possible consequences might be. “The child, as far as possible, should participate in the conversations preceding the expatriation of a parent or the whole family. The child should be reassured of the love and bond with both parents” – said the expert. It is vital, however, that these arrangements should be adhered to and that the child should not feel abandoned.

Dr Pomarańska said that the Congress of Families in Poland and the Polish Diaspora in Gdańsk gathered interesting guests, specialists from around the world. “The meeting and exchange of expertise can strengthen families and offer a toolbox with which to build and reinforce family bonds”, she said in an interview with Family News Service.

Renata Pomarańska is a researcher at the Catholic University of Lublin. She teaches a course on family science. At the Congress, she conducted workshops for children and young people over 15 years old: “I taught the children in a practical way through various exercises how to talk to their parents on a daily basis, both to be able to convey their message and be understood by them, and to be able to listen better and understand what mum and dad want to tell them”.

The Congress of Families is organised by the Polish Family Council at the Delegate of the Polish Bishops’ Conference for the Pastoral Care of Polish Emigrants. The Congress has received the honorary patronage of the Polish Bishops’ Conference. This year’s edition was held in a hybrid form, i.e. in person in Gdańsk and online. The participants came from Germany, France, Switzerland, the USA, Italy, Lithuania, and Ukraine.

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